Wild woods violets



Woods violets but there on the lawn
behind the depression
of a basement once dug out
where the old house stood, my father born there, inside.
And before air conditioning, my mother after a hot august day
and half a night,labor now in a hospital, brought me home.
Tho I don't remember.



But my father's mother's violets, those I do
because Mother's Day you bring your mother flowers
and my stubby little fingers picked them with care
small child sensing the debt, showing the gratitude
brought them to her, her face in the kitchen window
keeping close watch and wondering, as mothers do
what her boy was up to.



By Phil Specht on May 8, 2011

Evanescence of Pain, Persistence of Joy


Eight months disgorging my guts
in public places;
three with a numb thigh, and heavy
corset in heated weather;
22 and one half hours of labor;
thinking I'd likely not do this again

Waffles on this mother's day morning
Watching him work, sweating a little
muttering under his breath as we
carry a wall back into a small room

Remembering the look of wonder: at one, holding
a dandelion's white head, and blowing --
the flower's children sent forth to the
next greening, growing, flowering

And the one who came after, quick and bright
and hot. Rushing into the split between today
and forever as if there were not midnight, no dawn
Blood and tears, and doing it again and again

Fathers both, now, and I am grown old
mourning what I can no longer persuade
my body to do; things left undone
And the bright nodding heads of their children
dreaming not quite yet of their children

All of us ~~ link after link, move the gears
of time forward. Life seems like this: Stopping in
the middle of the poem to make chicken salad.
And just now the raucous spring song
of a Carolina Wren breaks the peace
with joy



jjl
8 May 2011

After my mother's death, the kids were at the funeral home, writing her obit. Someone was counting words (cost). The first version was something over $800. . . So we cut it back, leaving out accomplishments, activities, etc. Got it under $500. . . More cuts. . . . Still concern about the cost (and how much she'd have hated paying that kind of money). Finally someone (me?) said: if we want a cheap obit, we need to have picked a different mother. . . .

She was one helluva lady, woman, activist, and mom. . . . .

Thursday, May 5, 2011 8:58 PM, EDT (Ally’s Mommy’s 33rd Birthday)

Hello Again!
This morning we attended the annual Make-A-Wish breakfast. It was very moving when we walked in with the other wish families and all the donors stood up and clapped for us. Ally even managed to get 3 balloons! (We passed one along to another soon to be wish kid that lives near Grammie and Grampa Schulte.)

Sadly, today we found out that the City of Concord has cut funding for preschool, so Ally will not be able to attend next year. This is worrysome to me, as it has taken her up until pretty much this past week to be social with the other kids. It was the first time this week that she freely interacted with other kids while waiting to go inside. I am worried that if she has a year off, that Kindergarten will be too overwhelming for her. We are looking into other options, but are very disappointed at this point. Ally LOVES LOVES LOVES her teacher (and Daddy and I are so thankful to her, as we were not even sure school would ever be an option for Ally, and her teacher has made it one of Ally's most positive experiences)....if only the person who made the decision could have met Ally first...she would have changed their mind!

That's all for now. We will find out HAMA results next Tuesday or Wednesday.



Sunday, May 1, 2011 12:42 PM, EDT

Vacation has been great! I asked Ally the other night what her favorite part of Mommy being home all week was, and her response: "Max"
Max is our across the street neighbor. They moved in last fall, but due to Ally's crazy schedule and the feet and feet of snow we did not meet them until this week. Max and Ally quickly became friends. Max turned 2 in January, and has a pretty cool Mommy and Daddy. Ally often looks out the window to see if they are playing outside, and will often wonder what Max is doing when they are not together. They play very well together. I think a wonderful friendship has been made.

On the medical front: Ally gets HAMA drawn on Thursday, and we will find out the results the following Wednesday. If she is HAMA negative we could be in NYC the week of May 15th or May 22nd. Looking back, it was one year ago that Ally first became HAMA positive...I remember freaking out about it then. It is amazing what changes in a year. We always like to move forward with treatment, but then I think: if she is positive this time around, we will draw again in a month, and probably be able to put off the next round until school gets out, then I won't have to take another week off, and I could even end the year with 1-2 sick days left (that hasn't happened since Ally has been sick).

Ok...we are off to take a walk in the wonderful weather, and probably stop for an ice cream! I'll update later in the week about the Make-A-Wish breakfast!

new venison haunch winner

By Phil Specht on May 5, 2011

start with an overnight marinate (Kraft zesty Italian dressing) of cold haunch of venison roast

blacken an onion add some corn niblets on high heat while lightly steaming cauliflower and broccoli flowers

thin slice the venison and then a quick stir fry with all the veggies

melt smokey Swiss and cheddar on top as plated

almost as good as the lunch crowd conversation here

Just thinkin'. . . .

Every single site I use on the internets has a glitch. Some have many. Facebook has some kind of problem with scripts unable to resolve themselves. It can slow my browser for hours without notifying me so I can shut down that tab. It can crash my browser, or freeze my whole machine. HEP has a serious problem posting virtually *anything* takes two or three tries on nearly everything, sometimes 6 or 9 tries. The BBB after you edit takes you to a page, always, that it says doesn't exist. This problem in one form or another is going on three years. Other places change so often that no one can learn to use what features there *are*, give up and leave. One of my dating sites was hacked, which lead to a quick need for everyone (several million people) to get/insert new passwords. Time and the NYT take virtually forever (okay: ten minutes) to even load.

So I'm hoping that *nothing important* evah has to depend on the nets . . . .

We use the beast, make workarounds, adjust, get programs to deal with various glitches, but yanno? It doesn't *REALLY* work well, does it?

Look for you yesterday, here you come today

Today's find: Spring Beauty. And it *is* ~~ Claytonia virginica

Fringed Polygala, Gaywings, Flowering Wintergreen (Polygala paucifolia Willd.)

By Brandee Wenzel

Easily mistaken for an orchid, this bright little jewel is always a delight to stumble across. A member of the Polygalaceae or Milkwort Family, this and fellow species in the genus Polygala produce compounds reputed to increase milk production in nursing mammals. In fact, Polygala is derived from the Latin “poly” meaning “many, much” and “gala” meaning “milk”. Ethnobotanical references to Gaywings were recorded in James Herrick’s 1977 Iroquois Medical Botany, in which the majority of use was indicated for skin inflammations such as abscesses, boils, and sores.

Fringed polygala emerges from creeping, partly underground stems, and is typically no taller than 15 cm (6 inches). Its upper leaves are oval and crowded at the top of the stem, which gives this plant its resemblance to wintergreen. The light pink to deep magenta flowers are made up of five sepals and three petals. The sepals consist of three small outer and two large, showy petal-like “wings”. Of the petals, two are united to form a tubular structure, with the third keeled or boat-shaped petal cresting in a delicate yellow or pink fringe or frill. The keel encloses the reproductive structures, and when a bug lands on the keel, these structures are exposed for pollination. Besides the showy flowers that are insect-pollinated, there are also inconspicuous flowers that are borne underground and which self-fertilize without opening.

Besides Minnesota, gaywings thrive in dry to moist conifer forests from the eastern half of Canada and northeastern United States down to the mountains of Tennessee and Georgia. Its bloom time is spring to early summer. There are over 60 different kinds of Polygala in the United States, with the greatest diversity in the Southeast. Those of us living in the northern United States are fortunate to have an abundance of this wildflower to brighten our woods in the spring.

For More Information: PLANTS Profile - Polygala paucifolia, Fringed Polygala, Gaywings, Flowering Wintergreen

New river bed. . .

Funny. This picture looks so *composed* ~~ I did nothing at all but crop it.

Can someone tell me what this *IS*? Please. (click for full size)

S

Last flood of April. . . . Too much water to see *how much* damage. But there's gonna be a lot. . . .

Wednesday, April 27, 2011 5:21 PM, EDT

Ally had a blood draw today, to check her counts from last week's chemo. She did great! Her white blood cells were around 2.5 (normal person = 5 or 6), her ANC was about 850 (last week it was ~1100, so not a huge drop), and her red cells looked good, her platelets even went up!

We will draw for HAMA next Thursday! It would be a great birthday present for me if she was negative!

We are having a super fun week. Today we made some whoopie pies and delivered a few to Uncle Larry and were surprised to see Uncle Andy and Aunt Deb there! (I wonder if Uncle Larry shared the whoopie pies?) Then, we delivered some to our neighbors, and Daddy is bringing some to work tomorrow.

Since Ally's counts are good enough we are even going to go out and about tomorrow and Friday, then we spend the weekend with Daddy and next week I go back to work (but less than 2 months until Summer Vacation!!!)

Sunday, April 24, 2011 8:35 AM, EDT

Happy Easter!

Ally has been great the past few days. She has had 3 REALLY good nights of sleep (which means Mommy and Daddy have had 3 really good nights of sleep as well), has not had any more puking episodes, and has been full of energy. The only effect of the chemo we are seeing right now is a very low appetite. (We assume her blood counts are low as well, but we have not had a blood draw yet to see how low they actually are.) Today is the first day we are not giving her her anti-nausea medicine, and we are hoping she won't need it.

NOTE! Today (the 25th) is Ally’s parents’ 7th wedding anniversary!!!!!!!

The Sun on Easter

It's still gray, not yet light.

The clouds rest like islands

on the mountain side, snow filling

the spaces between the trees,

a maze of paths my eyes

climb and walk. It's Easter

Sunday though you couldn't

tell that from my window as I

watch the sky and mountain

before this morning's dawn.

It's quiet as I wait expecting

light as it comes so reliably

every day of our lives.

But, what if it didn't today?

What if we would only know

this grayness, this waiting?

There is a somberness in

the time before light, an

acknowledgment of need

for light in this our one life.

By Pat Maslowski on Apr 24, 2011

Arisen

From the icy grip

the earth awakes, not from primal instinct

there is no evolution says the Church, while everywhere woodland flowers

proclaim resurrection in a yeah so attitude

whatever, party on. No.

as if this annual miracle was less.

Is it in the northland that death's door locks shut

til the tilt again favors the sun, the son, The Son.

worthy of celebration even had Christ had not issued

the invitation to arise, we, too, with the Creation.

By Phil Specht on Apr 24, 2011

It's *really* a Chokecherry pome, lol! Been looking for the name of this critter for *years*!!

Easter Pome



Snow has faded
Fields are green and greener

Gold coins of Lion's Teeth scattered
along road edges and ribs

Small bunnies fill coyote tummies
Bright blaze of Cardinal

And the apples, ancient by any reckoning
agree to bloom, again

And the Chokecherry!!

If there's more to be asked
I don't know what it would be


jjl
23 Aprille 2011

Happy Mama's Day, everbody!

.