Journal, such as it is. . . .

10 - 12 2006 9:27 AyeM

Beginning to feel doors close here: RCN called yesterday about the late bill. Which prolly means I don't have two weeks. . . . Have to find the new bill and call them. Also, need to pay my own bills in WV, so that I *can* go home again.

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Just checked. Cable will go on the 19th, phone on the 24. Or I can pay the bill. . . . $249. Hardly seems worth it. . . .

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Thinking about the mess I'm trying to clean up. Very nearly got pissed a minute ago. Guess pissed is a good thing: everyone sez so.



October 13, 2006 9:54 ehEm

The first laughter feels like betrayal.
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Going "Home" to a place that doesn't feel like home anymore. Hasn't in fact *been* my home for a year an a half (since I first came here). Home was where my heart was. Now home is ashes. And I have to leave this place: things shutting down around me, faster than I'd like: lights burning out, phones shut down, and about to be shut down. The landlord will be knocking on the door soon. So I clear, clean, and pack. Pain, gnawing bones, must be put on the back burner so "things" can get done. And when "things" no longer matter, then what?